December 24, 2009
Why a sub?
As a mature man, I can’t say I completely understand why I still find pleasure in being a slave to women, but I have to confess that just the thought has always given me intense sexual arousal. I guess I have always felt awed in the presence of a pretty woman but never felt I knew how to please her. That is probably why I get the greatest arousal when a woman takes control and ownership of my body and through a regime of humiliation, rewards and punishments, instructs me on how she wants me to please her.
It is an unexplainable paradox for me that I feel the most manly when I am kneeling naked in front of a woman with my ass burning from the punishment she just gave me and I am kissing and caressing her feet in gratitude.
My question to the dominant women in the group is, what attracts you to be a dominant? Is it simply the power over men (or women), is it erotic, or is it something else? If you do find it sexually arousing, is it visual (like seeing a naked man in an awkward state of arousal or his bright red ass), sensual (enjoying the sub licking your toes or feeling him squirm on your lap as you paddle him) or again something else? Is the experience the same with female subs as it is with male subs?
Finally, what would you say, in your opinion, would be the attributes of the perfect male subordinate? What would be the scenario of the best short term session and for the best long term relationship with a male sub? Would it be different with a female sub?
Submitted by: Guy10
January 13th, 2010 at 10:52 pm
The perfect male submissive is an unreality. Things I look for in a man as a submissive are understanding that there is more to our relationship than D/s. I want conversation and someone to laugh with too. A warm body to share the bed or get out of it and back into his bondage if the mood to be wicked strikes me. I don’t like the term vanilla in the way people see it as BDSM and everything else is vanilla. Vanilla play is part of the whole for me. It is from the everyday that I get my best inspiration for enjoying him in his submission. For me the play is not some big production but an extension of sex, foreplay and passion. Domming is fun for me. Yes, it is also a turn on physically, mentally and emotionally but I like to laugh too. I like to have him in bondage twitching and squirming and see the humour in all of it. He does look funny. The penis itself is crude and funny looking. No wonder it makes such a good toy, such a good way to torment and tease him. Being a Dominant is fun. When I stop having fun with it something is wrong. If I start to feel I’m just going through the motions to please him I know I have gotten off track. This basic fact gets missed in a lot of the literature, illustrations and talk about what female domination is.
February 9th, 2010 at 12:31 am
I agree with Laura - the severe face does not make us more dominant, and smile doesn’t make our thoughts less mischievous
I often laugh when playing as the subs are there to entertain me, not opposite - and the better they perform, the more fun I have…